Warm Weather is a Tease

For the past few days it's been in the 70's and 80's, and I am absolutely in love with the warm weather. Too bad it's going to drop to 60 degrees again tomorrow, the day after I finally drag my ass to the mall and buy some shorts for the first time in years. Oh, well...I guess that means I'll appreciate the warmth even more when it comes back.

Anyway...I haven't been writing here as much, and I don't know why. It bothers me because I finally convinced myself this was something I'd never give up on...unlike the pile of diaries from my childhood that lasted three days, a week at the most. This week has proved me wrong...or maybe I've been lying to myself the whole time. I do that a lot. The sad thing about it is that I always believe myself, for a little while. I've been doing that more than usual lately...lying to myself, I mean. 

Lying about a dwindling friendship that I tell myself is just fine, or that it's not my fault because I'm busy and don't spend a lot of time online...

Lying about a friendship that is progressing although I tell myself it's not just because I don't want it to...

Lying about caring for him, which I tell myself I don't...

How does my mother still think I'm an honest person when I can't even be honest with myself? 

And more importantly, since when did this entry turn into a depressed rant?

I'm forgetting I wrote this and taking a walk...enjoying the last of the sunshine.

Bye.